What happens? Is it literally wall-to-wall bodies? We configure the living space of the residence to be a large, communal play area. We don’t play in bedrooms or side rooms. For the most part people pair off in couples, but it’s not unusual to see three, four, or even more people in a tangle of arms and legs. For the most part people flow from partner to partner organically, taking breaks when they feel like it and diving back in when the mood strikes.
How does the evening flow? We start at 7:00 and ask everyone to be on time. The first hour or so feels like a group of friends having a cocktail party, while first-timers are pulled aside for a private tour and briefing on what to expect. Then around 8:00 we have a consent circle where everyone shares their desires and expectations for the evening, and after that play commences. Clothes start coming off more or less immediately and people generally dive right into play.
Do I have to have sex with someone I’m not attracted to? Absolutely not. Consent is foundational at Indulgence. At the same time, our whole reason for being is to engage in a community sex expeience. If that’s not what you’re looking for, or if you find you’re not attracted to the members of the Indulgence community, then we’re probably not the right place for you. There are lots of other good options out there, and we are sure you will find one that fits.
Is there a charge? We do not charge for Indulgence parties. This is a private party thrown on by the organizers for our, and our friends’, personal enjoyment. We do ask that you pitch in and bring your own alcohol, a light appetizer, and condoms, though, and help us clean up a bit afterward. It goes quickly and can be fun!
When do the parties start and end? We begin at 7:00 and end around 11:00. We ask that you be on time, because we do have a timeline for the evening and we know people are excited to get to the sex!
Where are the parties held? We hold our parties at one of a couple of private residences in the San Francisco Bay Area. We publish the party address to confirmed party attendees a few days before the party itself.
Are there themes? Indulgence isn’t really a theme party, but we do have a Halloween theme for our October party and a Holiday theme in December. We will let you know from party to party if there’s a specific theme.
What should I bring? Bring your own alcohol and a light appetizer to share. And bring enough condoms to last the evening; the party hosts will have some on hand, but not enough for a group that size.
How should I dress? The party is usually a “sexy party” attire vibe. Women often choose an outfit that is sexier than you could wear on the street, and the men should look reasonably sharp. But remember that our residences are in family-friendly neighborhoods so if you’re going risque, please wear a long coat over it between the car and the house.
If I’m single can I bring a date? We love our singles, and in fact one of the hosts is a single man. We also understand that it can be more fun to attend something like this with a date. We gladly invite singles to bring dates, but we do require that one of the hosts has a chance to meet your date and agree prior to giving the green light. We want to make sure that your date fits the philosophy, understands what she or he is getting into, and isn’t, say, one of our exes (which might be a bit awkward for all involved!).
How do you communicate with attendees before the party? We set up a WhatsApp thread before every party and communicate through the app. Note that we do a new thread for each party so that we can target communications to the people attending that particular party.
Wait, what, we need to be vetted? We try to be very mindful about the group we curate, and are aware that Indulgence is not for everybody. We have a strict rule to meet everyone before their first party with us, no exceptions, even if it’s the date of someone who has been there before. We want to make sure they understand what we’re all about and are looking for the type of experience we provide. The meeting could be as simple as a Zoom call, could be coffee or a drink, or could even be a play date (if everyone is up for it).
Is there a limit on the party size? Our venues are only so large, and we do in fact cap the maximum number of attendees at 30 per party. It’s rare that we have to turn people away based on being full, but if you are on the invitation list it’s not a bad idea to get your RSVP in sooner than later!
How do I get an invitation? Is there a vetting process? We invite our friends – people we know personally – to our parties. That isn’t to say new people don’t come to our parties; we’re making new friends all the time. If you know someone you think would be a really good fit and you want them to get an invitation, reach out to one of the hosts and we will be happy to meet and vet them.
How do I get in touch with the organizers? Indulgence is a private party that we throw for our personal friends and is not open to the public. If you know one of the party organizers, the best idea would be to reach out to them directly. [Gang, I’m still wondering if there is any downside to having an “info@” email address. If we get no outreach, we’re no worse off. If we hear from single men or couples we aren’t interested in no worries since we will vet them out. If we hear from really great couples/single women then it’s a win. Thoughts?]